So as many of you probably know by now, last night BritBrit kicked off her Circus tour in New Orleans. This is the first time in FIVE years that she’s back on tour – within those last five years; she spent 3 of them doing this:
Kfed, mothering his children (that’s gotta suck), getting fat in the process, shaving her head and then attacking a SUV with an umbrella right after, getting hospitalized, partying with paris and lilo, showing off her crotch several times, throwing hissy fits on the sets of magazine photoshoots, being whisked away in a stretcher from her home in the middle of the night, some more partying, attempting to get fit for the 2007 (or was it 2008?) Mtv movie awards where she then attempted to perform (but we all know how that went down – even her lip synching was off), letting her kids have a turn with the car, having a hit and run – CAUGHT ON FILM by the swarm of paparazzi that was there in action, dating a paparrazi, perfecting her British accent, was probably diagnosed bi-polar (but no one took that seriously because she’s Britney-fricken-Spears and as long as it was entertaining, then it couldn’t possibly have been harmful to her well-being), and then some.
Man, do I love using long descriptive run-on sentences. HOLY MACK.
She basically had the longest TRAINWRECK-CAR-CRASH-THAT-YOU-CAN’T-LOOK-AWAY-FROM meltdown of the last couple of years!! Well done Brit. Mariah Carey’s meltdown ain’t shit. But that was then.
Now I’m glad to see her back in her hair-whipping, to-the-syllable lip synching, sparkly belly-baring-ensemble-wearing glory. Yes, HAIR-whipping (well technically it's extensions, but in attempts to perserve the image of her in her pre-Kfed days, we'll pretend that it's real hair). Now the question of whether or not the show was actually any good...well that's debatable.
Must Listen:
If You Seek Amy - Britney Spears
(& If you don't get what why there's so much "controversy" about this song, just say "If You Seek Amy" repeatedly really fast. You'll get it.)
